Our film reveals that the poem “What it’s like to be me”, discussed by the college professor, was composed by a man with severe ASD who types to talk. How can we believe that?
What it’s like to be me
AB, 29 Jan 2003
I’m a bundle of sensations
I get the urge
to touch and pick
and I must follow my urges.
Can you see my urges?
I can’t tell you
I just show you.
I’m a bundle of nerves
and a jumble of thoughts.
I’m in constant motion
and my mind’s always going.
I wonder what it’s like to be you.
Do you wonder what it’s like to be me?
I’m a time bomb waiting to explode
and a tear waiting to fall.
This poem is by Andrew Bloomfield who has typed his poetry since late 2002. He had more frequent communication support for nearly three years before that, using his chances to comment on his life and greatest needs. Just before his first poem, he met a music therapist who showed him that his words could be set to music. He learned to play some notes on guitar and piano while she sang the words.
Andrew has now published 140 poems in three collections: In my mind (2006), with his memoir Bridges over barriers in my life with autism (2011), and Images in my mind (2013). His thoughts and subjects have matured and include his passion for words and images. His poems are lyrical and rich in meaning and sustained metaphors. He gives us insight into how he experiences his life, rising above his severe challenges with hope, empathy and a hint of irony. Above all, he appeals for understanding and the chance to realize his potential and “to be me!”
Andrew’s poetry is an example of the abilities of a fair proportion of people on the Autism spectrum. Some have remarkable analytical abilities in mathematics and science. Others are creative writers, musicians and artists. Factors in Andrew’s poetry are his fascination with words; his need to grab our attention; his distinctive sensory perception including synesthesia that shows in his images; and the painful difficulty of picking out his messages, one character at a time, so he compresses his meaning into striking phrases and images.
Bridges-Over-Barriers® by Andrew Bloomfield
In early January 2004, three men met in Guelph to share our thoughts, using what we now call Supported Typing. We found this time so precious that we have continued to meet almost every month (except in midwinter weather). More communicators have joined us, from all over southern Ontario, and we have members in New Mexico, Nova Scotia and France, as well as friends around the world.
Gatherings are planned in ways that help us all to stay calm. An agenda and questions are emailed in advance for discussions about anything from spirituality to special diets. A good structure is planned, with communication sessions morning and afternoon. Quiet music, a cool room, hikes and a lunch break are important. We may view and discuss videos on topics important to us and share our interests in music, painting, our experience of nature and plants, and our concerns about life transitions. Our parents, friends, facilitators and support workers bring us to Guelph and provide us with the physical and emotional support. They are patient and supportive; they believe in us and build our confidence.
We the communicators shape the flow of discussion and are the main talkers. We have grown close. It is exhilarating having a group of real friends, because we can really share and connect. We keep a record of what people say unless it is private. We type about our good news, hopes and fears. There is always time to mention difficulties we may be having in our lives. We have talked about being autistic, obsessions and lack of control, and making friends. We prove that autistics can have feelings for others and stay focused for a long time. The ideas and words are ours. The gatherings are made by and for us; we have support and a safe environment to talk. Over lunch the facilitators and family members and supporters can add their thoughts and share news and resources.
Bridges-Over-Barriers became our name in mid-2005. A bridge was my image of how Supported Typing can connect my island to the mainland society and overcome my frustrations in being misunderstood and not in control of my life. Bridges is a very special support group. We are all quite different in our personalities and circumstances but very similar in how we communicate and see the world. We share what is important to us and always learn something interesting from the meetings. We all try very hard to be caring and respectful of one another.
Groups like ours are rare because we have been assumed not to have thoughts or feelings. We have not been educated or encouraged to express our thoughts. Once we are adults, people may think we have no hope of growing our minds and showing our intelligence. Bridges is special as we invite and welcome people to come to us; we cannot wait forever for the community to think of including us. Guests and observers are welcome at Bridges gatherings: we ask them to come with open minds and to observe our “protocol”. We need a calm quiet atmosphere to focus on thinking and typing. If observers come and make discouraging remarks without listening to us, this matters because we autistics have no filters, and so are bombarded by all kinds of stimuli through our senses including negative energy from others.
Guelph Services for the Autistic has helped Bridges to spread the word about communication rights and abilities. Individual communicators are supported to develop their skills and experience. In 2010 we published a documentary film with a book, In Our Own Words. We have unbounded dreams of reaching everyone who needs support.
When I communicate with my Bridges group I feel like we’ve always been together and that we have a connection deeper than family. I guess we are in fact a type of family sharing the common bond of silence in a world that is seldom silent.
We have much to say. We support one another. We want our message to reach everyone who lives and works with autistic people. Please assume we are intelligent, help us to express ourselves, and listen….
Andrew Bloomfield. What everyone yearns for: The Ontario story of Bridges-Over-Barriers. Canadian Journal of Disability Studies 1, 2 (2012). http://cjds.uwaterloo.ca/index.php/cjds/article/view/46/53
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